This year I’m going to give you the secret that is the basic foundation to a new healthy, happy, You!

As you remember, the F in SELFISH stands for the food you fuel your body with. Clean, lean, organic, non-processed foods. That’s it!

If you can hunt it, catch it, pick it, or pluck it (I got that from Dr. Jonny Bowden), you are good to go. Just not processed. Nothing that needs to be processed to be able to eat, like pasta, bread, chips, pretzels, or anything made in a factory.

Now don’t get hung up on the small stuff. “What about potatoes, rice…?” Just remember the more that has to be done to the raw food, the less beneficial if is to your body. If you are eating a rainbow of colors at each meal, you won’t have to worry about whether you eat potatoes or not. If you can adopt the idea of straight from nature, cleaned, cut up, maybe cooked, then eaten, you will be getting the most nutritional bang for your buck. Period.

Yes, there are a few exceptions:

• Tomatoes, which are great for you raw, but when cooked with oil, the lycopene is more easily absorbed, so tomato sauce and tomato paste from cans, as long as they are organic, are still good for your body.
• Olives have to go through a process to be eatable and not bitter. This is obviously worth the processing because of all it’s omega-3 qualities.
• Beans are another food that can retain their nutritional benefits and still come from a can.
• Cheese is another food that goes through a process, but as long as it is a minimal, natural process, and eaten sparingly, it’s ok.  No processed cheese spreads, blocks, or whizzes! I mean it!
• Almond milk and soy milk are also processed but still good for you, so stick with the organic varieties.
• And of course there’s wine, which goes through a process to be drinkable, but what can I say… it’s the elixir of life!

So you get the idea. The less done to the natural state of food, the better it is for your body. You just have to get use embrace that mind set, and make it your default. Your question at each meal is “How processed is this food?” If the food is just seasoned, sauteed, sauce made from the pan drippings, a squeeze of citrus, and it’s on your plate, you are good to go. If it has been chemically processed to look a certain way, or taste a certain way, or came from a can or package, run… run like the wind!

It is a simple as that!

Cheers to your health and happiness!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

How great is it to have the opportunity to start over?  Start fresh!  Begin again!

Wow!  There is some serious power in that.  It almost takes my breath away…. almost.

But I still have enough where withall to seize this chance to make the life I’ve always wanted for myself.  No excuses, no hesitation, no holding back.  There is nothing to fear but fear itself!

Back on the track that I know will bring me success, and happiness. Excited to embark on my new existence. I can feel it… really!  I can feel it in my smile, my step and my attitude. I’m happy almost all the time, which is a blessing unto itself. I’m thinking positively. I’m glad to get up each morning. I’m where I need to be to make this Dream a reality. Thank you God.

No more listening to others who worry that I’m not being realistic.  No more listening to people who think I should fit some mold that THEY are comfortable with.  No more letting anyone sour my ambition and excitement by their insecurity.

Last year really sucked, no matter how hard I tried to make it better. Just think if I hadn’t chosen to respond positively to the negative… I would have been a basket case, trust me. But that is a testament to how important it is to choose a positive response to life. I didn’t want to end up at the bottom of a crevasse… the end of my dreams… because someone else was pissed at me for divorcing them.

Well, no more! I will bloom as the person I know I am, and never succumb to the opinions of others. Never again!

I’m getting new exercise shoes for the new year. I’ve got a new attitude in the form of a fabulous new hair do. I’ve got a new interest in doing things that make me feel and look good. Like I said before, this year is all about ME!

I encourage you to join me. It’s OUR turn to be exactly who WE want to be! OUR turn to not listen to anyone or anything that will get in our way! Those days are OVER!

It’s all about US!

Again, thank you God!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

It’s time for you to get comfortable with the word “Pleasure”.

It’s time for you to start getting pleasure from your everyday life. Whether it’s grocery shopping, watching your child’s practice, getting your hair done… enjoy  yourself.

Life is too short to not have fun. But if you aren’t a naturally happy person, or things are just tough right now, you are going to have to make a conscious effort to get the most out of your daily life.

Then there are those of us who feel a twinge of guilt when we do something strictly for our own pleasure… hearing those old tapes that tell us we are being self centered for doing anything that is just for us. I hate those old tapes… But that comes from our old, unhappily married life… and we are living in our new, positive, fulfilling life.

Don’t look back, and don’t listen! Get comfortable with pleasure. It’s good for your soul.

Now, you can’t always dial “something exciting” into your day. So you have to derive pleasure when you can. And it doesn’t have to be anything big, although that is fun. Just taking time to sit out in the sun, eyes closed, facing the sky, soaking in the warmth. Or buying your favorite cup of the “holiday coffee”. Or adding that favorite piece of vintage jewelry to your everyday outfit – just for fun. Wearing your favorite, most expensive perfume with jeans and a t-shirt. Or wearing risque underwear under your work clothes…. Shall I go on?

Then, of course, there is the intentional pleasure. Luxurious bubble bath, fabulous metallic pumps, spa day, weekend getaway, your favorite champagne in your favorite flute just to celebrate the day. Light those candles on a daily basis. Have fresh flowers on the counter in your favorite vase. Again, it doesn’t have to be big, just pleasurable.

You add a whole different dimension to daily life when you take a minute to enjoy yourself. If you are getting pleasure from the little things in life, you are feeding your soul and spirit. There is an inner peace that come from happiness.  And we can build that inner peace on a daily basis by taking care of your own emotional needs to feel special, and pampered.

And if you don’t do it, who will? If you take care of your own needs now, you will be stronger when the next “storm blows in.”

And don’t forget, It’s Your Turn!

You are a Selfish Woman who deserves to enjoy everyday of her life!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

So you are going along with your daily life, trying to solve the world’s problems, one person at a time, when you start feeling bad. Physically.

Your body starts to act up…. you know, sick.

Your head starts hurting, your stomach is always upset, you start having irregular bleeding… insert your symptom here.

But there you go… still saying yes to the requests made of you. Now I might add here that these are not mandatory obligation, just requests from people who know that if they want something done, to give it to you!

Drum roll…….. now the stress is building. The stress of knowing that you don’t feel good anymore. And that none of the projects you are doing are being done to your standards. Don’t you just hate that!

Stop! Just stop! Stop saying yes to everything that comes your way. Start asking yourself  ”Does this get me any closer to my goal? To my Dream Life?”

If the answer is yes, then do it with gusto. If the answer is no, don’t do it.  Period.

It’s time to prioritize. It’s time to start thinking of yourself first. It’s Your Turn, remember???

When you are aligned with your correct life path, you won’t feel sick. You won’t feel so stressed that it makes you literally ill.

You will feel exhilaration. You will feel happiness. You will be excited to get up every morning. This is our goal for your life.

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

Once change starts…things are never the same again.

It never fails, once changed has been initiated, your world is altered forever.

No matter how much you fight it, or try to explain it away, the reality is that it will never go back to “when it was good” or the way it was before.

We try so hard to keep things from changing in our world, especially when it is what we thought we wanted, or needed, in our life.  What we need to accept is that change happens for a reason. Somehow, someone in your world isn’t happy with the way things are. They initiate the change. And you have to deal with it.

A wisdom I’ve learned over the years is to “go with the flow.” The times I have tried to fight the inevitable, I’ve always lost. Even if I think I’ve won, things never go back to the way they were. Feelings are changed forever. Maybe not drastically, but its definitely different.

Sometimes it feel like you are getting bombarded with a lot of changes all at once. It’s exhausting! That’s when you need to get more sleep. Try to remain calm. Exercise. Breath! Do whatever you derive comfort from. It’s also important to remind yourself  what’s really important in life.

The smoother we can handle these times of transition, the sooner it will be over. Fighting prolongs the pain of change. Accepting the new conditions shortens the recovery period.

Acceptance is the key. Choose to respond in a positive way. Make the most of the situation, what ever it is. Don’t participate in the negative. This too will pass. Life will settle back down, and you will be happy again.

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

As wrong as it is, bad things happen to everybody.

Being the control freaks/problem solvers we are, we think we could or should have been able to prevent this stab in the heart, whatever form it takes. We over analyze the signs we should have seen, or how we could have planned ahead to avoid the dreaded outcome.

Reality is we can’t! No matter how hard we try to control everything in our world to keep negative things from happening, they still do. As long as other people are involved in the equation, you do not have the ultimate control. All of their “baggage” can’t help but seep into their interaction with other people, and there you are, effected by other peoples’ “stuff.” They’ve had a whole other life happen long before you were exposed to them, and you don’t know where they’ve been!

The sooner you face this, the happier your life will be. The sooner you embrace the idea of going with the flow, the healthier and less stressful your existence will be. All you can control is how you choose to respond to what happen to you. That is in your control.

You can choose to respond with a positive attitude, and make sure things turn out in the best way possible, or you can wallow in self pity, pout… still not changing anything… and prolong the misery. Your Choice!

There is an instant freedom in this reality. Once you accept the fact that you are not responsible for what happens to everything and everyone in your life, you think about things differently. Your creative juices flow free and clear again. You don’t take everything so personally. Your ability to choose a positive response becomes much easier. You don’t have the burden of the world on your shoulders anymore. You get back in emotional balance. You are able to enjoy life again.

And isn’t that what life should be about?

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

It’s amazing how powerful an escape from reality can be. Even if just for a few days.

You are working hard to juggle all the changes for your new life. Positive changes, but changes none the less.

It’s very demanding on you mentally and physically. And at some point, you are going to need to step away from your “life”, and take a breather.

But the benefits are astounding!

• You have a renewed passion for making your Dream Life a reality
• You are calm, relaxed and peaceful
• You can see your goals clearly again.
• Not to mention the change in environment can be good for your ego!  (Insert imagination here.)

I just got back from a short trip to the wine country in Sonoma and Napa Valleys in California. The experience was peaceful, beautiful, and restful. I feel whole again. I’m rejuvenated, and ready to finish what I’ve started. I’m back on track to making my Dream Life a reality.

I’m also reminded how visually beautiful life can be. It’s good to be reminded. You can’t improve on Nature. She’s bigger than all of us. But sometimes we get so wrapped up in what seems like an insurmountable task, that we don’t appreciate the beauty and blessings around us. We loose sight of them, along with our goals. But when we step back and take a breath, we can see clearly again, and we remember how much we want to make our goals reality.

It really is possible. It can be done.

AND YOU’RE WORTH IT! GET BACK ON TRACK! MAKE IT HAPPEN!

IT’S YOUR TURN!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

Isn’t it amazing how all of the sudden you wake up one day and your whole life is changing…again?

You know, that time period between the divorce and your finally being on your own, literally?

It comes in phases.

Phase I:  the actual divorce and your ex moving out

Phase II: the recovery period, where you try to catch your breath and make sense of it all

Phase III: when you start to see the beauty of your future, and focus on achieving your Dream Life

Phase IV: when your children start moving out, for what ever reason, and you’re OK with it.

The order of the last two can interchange. But it’s amazing how fast that time passes…

None of us can completely control how this unfolds, because there are too many factors involved that you don’t have control over. Like how other people will act or react to what has happened to your family. The dynamics of that are volatile.  Depending on how hurt the feelings are of the participants dictates how rough the transition will be.

Hopefully you will have the time you need in each phase to be emotionally ready for the next one.

But the reality is that you can wake up one day and get thrown into a phase that you are not ready for.

You are going along, thinking you have a handle on the changes that your life has taken. Then all of the sudden, you get hit in the head with, yet again, another big change. Damn! How long is this going to keep happening? Enough already!

Brace yourself:  Your survival technique has to be go with the flow.The more you fight the inevitable, the harder your life becomes. And usually people fight the inevitable because they want to think they can control everything, or they don’t want to face the change.

Remember, once the change has been initiated, things will never go back to what they once were, no matter now much you fight against it, or for it.

You have to accept the fact that you can only control how you are going to respond to what happens, not what happens!

The sooner you learn this lesson, the sooner you can control the type of life you will live.

Make the conscious choice to respond positively to whatever life dishes out. You need to enjoy life on a daily basis. You never know what tomorrow will bring, especially if your recent history is any indication!

You have to break that unhappy cycle. You have to decide that you are not going to participate in the negative anymore. It’s all up to you!

Remember, it’s your turn to be happy for a change. It’s your turn to be a SELFISH WOMAN! YOU DESERVE IT!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

Again, it’s time to be SELFISH.

It’s time to successfully make the changes needed to accomplish your Dream Life.

The keys to success are to see what you want, live what you want, and be what you want to be. It’s that powerful!

See it!

Live it!

Be it!

The forces in the universe will align and contribute to making your Dream Life come true. But you have to do your part, which is…repeat after me:

See it!

Live it!

Be it!

Visualize what your Dream Life looks like… what your job is, what house you live in, what car you drive, where you vacation. What your physique looks like, what your hair looks like. What type of man you have sitting in your 2-door convertible, top down, driving up HWY 101 in California, your scarf flapping in the breeze. I can see it!

The more detail you attach to the vision, the more real it will become.

The sooner you start living as if the dream is real, the sooner it will become real. It’s the “live as if” theory.

Live as if you already are that person in your Dream Life. If you believe it, they believe it! Attitude is the greatest asset you have. And it is all in your control.

Attitude is what separates success from failure. Once you achieve a certain level of competence, attitude takes over. Belief in yourself will take you to your goal.

If you want to be a glamourous version of yourself, live like it. If you want to be the vivacious, dynamic person in your vision, be it, live it, just do it!

It doesn’t matter what others say about the new you. You may hear “That’s not the real you!” from old “friends”, but the reality is this is the new you. To hell with them! No one will hold you back from achieving your Dream Life! Especially old “friends!” Remember, you’ve divorced yourself from that mind set. Don’t fall back into it.

Do not tolerate any more negativity in your life. It will only suck the determination out of you. And we can’t have that!

Eliminate as much negative input from your daily life as possible. I’m serious. Cut out the news if you have to. Stop reading the paper, or your stock portfolio. Stop exposing yourself to cynical, negative people. That means family, too. And none of that mindless, draining, numbing TV.

Now is when you need positive reinforcement, not life leaching negativity.

Surround yourself with what makes you happy. Fresh flowers, candles, music, color, laughter, happy people. Now it is more important than ever before to be see the beautiful, positive side of life. It will feed your soul, and give you the strength to make your Dream Life a reality.

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

One of my favorite sports commentators is Mary Carillo. She describes the world of women’s tennis as “Big Babe Tennis.” I love that!

Here is my hommage to that description:

I choose to live in the “Big Babe World.”

I will never be that skinny, gaunt woman in the room, who is too worried about how she looks to other people (not to mention grumpy from hunger). Or who is too self-conscious to voice her opinions, and enjoy her life.

I will be the healthy, happy woman in the room, who is commanding attention, and glowing with confidence.

We have to start working with what Mother Nature gave us, and stop thinking we have to be something we are not.

Exercising, being active, enjoying your life, and living in the “Big Babe World” is a conscious decision. Make it!

One aspect of living in the “Big Babe World” is making the most of our physical self. Not striving for the unrealistic image projected by the media. It’s being the best our body can be.

This is where exercise comes in. It just takes discipline, which you are needing in other parts of your life right now, anyway. If you can master self-discipline here, you can apply it to all other areas of your life.

Think about it this way:  You will be taking control of your body and health, just like you are taking control of your life and your happiness.

The results will be confidence and pride, not to mention a sexier, healthier, happier You! And we haven’t even talked about the endorphins you get. How great it that?

Also, increase your basic daily activity level. Go out as often as possible. And I don’t mean cruising. I mean taking the dog for a walk, going to see live music in the park, enjoying different festivals in your town. What ever form it takes, explore where you live. You will be increasing your daily caloric use, and having fun at the same time.

The more you get out and do new things, the more active your life is, and the more you expose yourself to new experiences and new people.

This is one of our goals.

Another aspect of living in the “Big Babe World” is living large in your personality.

Being the dynamic personality that you have inside, you just haven’t always had the confidence to let it shine.

This is another one of our goals.

We are going to work on that….. aren’t we?

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!