We live for feelings. That’s why we do what we do in the first place – for the feeling it give us.

Whether it is for the thrill, the fear, the peace, the turmoil, the happiness or the sadness (which I really don’t get) we base decisions on how an action will make us feel.

It’s not the act of acquiring things, it’s the feeling we get when we do so. It’s not the accomplishment we make, it’s how it makes us feel when we have accomplished something.

Think about it – when we do something nice for someone, it makes us feel good. And yes, there are people out there that will be mean to someone and it makes them feel good. Evil, I know, but true none the less.

So if feelings dictate actions, we can satisfy the feelings we want and need by our actions. We can choose how we are going to feel.

If you are at a place in your life where you are making big changes in your daily existence, you can choose how successful those changes are going to be by your actions. You can choose your actions by how they are going to make you feel. If every decision gets closer and closer to your Dream Life, you are going to feel happy, empowered and alive! And with the accomplishment of each stage of change, you will be building positive momentum that will carry you even faster toward your goal.

Feelings can be good. Feelings can be a great motivator. But feelings can also suck the life out of you. What you must learn is that you have complete control over how you are going to feel. No one can make you feel guilty but yourself. No one can make you feel inferior but yourself. Only YOU can accept those feelings. If you don’t accept them, you don’t feel them! It’s that easy! Did I just bury the lead???

The most empowering thing you can do for yourself is set yourself free! Free from all those negative, life-sucking, energy-draining feelings other people have tried to instill in you for their own purpose. You can’t be a power to contend with if you are weak and sad. You are much easier to dominate if you are subservient and powerless.

To HELL with that!

You don’t ever have to feel that again! Ever! You can choose to accept those feelings or you can choose to never accept those feelings again! Period!

Most of the pain and sadness we harbor is of our own choosing. For some reason we choose to hang on to memories that make us feel that way. But we don’t have to! We can release ourselves from those feelings and refuse to accept them anymore.

Yes, we all have had sad things happen in our past, and yes, the event was sad. But you don’t have to continue to be sad over the memory. It doesn’t change the outcome of the past, but it does change the outcome of the future.

Set yourself free! Choose your feelings! Choose how happy you are going to be! Choose how successful you are going to be! It is all in your control!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

How great is it to get away? Even if it is only for a short time. I love to travel. The escape factor is so exhilarating!

That break from daily life can work magic. It can get you back on track with a renewed interest.

Sometimes we start drifting through our days, loosing focus and not being as productive toward our goals. It’s easy to do. Routine can be good, but it can also lull you into inefficiency. This is when a weekend getaway can do wonders.

A few days at a spa with the girls, a weekend shopping in another city, basking on a beach somewhere, going to a concert in Vegas or New York City… insert your getaway here.

When I travel, I feel more alive. My creative juices start flowing. I get out of my little world and see what other people see. I get inspired by the experience itself. And I always learn something new. Never fails. Which is part of the beauty of traveling. I come home more enlightened and more energized. Then I ride that wave back into my own life.

If you don’t go overboard financially, you can go more often. Yes, I love to go to Europe or scuba diving for a few weeks at a time, but it’s the short trips that breathe new life into my creativity.

When you are working toward a goal, which for me is my dream life, it’s easy to get tired. You are constantly thinking and planning how to accomplish that goal. Sometimes the research alone can make you feel like you are not achieving anything. Sometimes it makes you feel like there is too much to learn for you to stick to the time frame you have given yourself to accomplish your goal.

That’s when a short trip is needed. Badly!

Try it. Even if you just get in the car and to go the next town, give yourself a break from your norm and get away. It will clear your head. You will have time to look at things more objectively. You will see where you have been spending your energies. You will redirect your focus. Your goal will become clear to you again. And you will get back on track.

Ah, the magic of a quick getaway!

Do it! Because you are worth it! It’s your turn!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

It’s important to be inspired by other successful people. You know, the ones who created something from nothing. They conquered their fear of the unknown and created their own special vision for their life.

Whether it was creating a non-profit organization, a specialty retail business or deciding to share wisdom they learned from their own experiences, they are considered entrepreneurs. The word entrepreneur comes from the French word to “undertake.”

When you re-invent yourself, you “undertake” a new vision for your future. You dare to see yourself differently. That can be scary.

But the reality is “why not?” Why not live the life you dream of living? Why not do exactly what YOU want to do, not what someone else wants you to do? Because as you recall, IT’S YOUR TURN!

You are lucky enough to get a second chance to make your dream a reality. You are lucky enough to know by now what your strengths are and how to make them shine. You are wise enough to know that the outcome is in your control. It’s all in how you choose to respond. And you aren’t going to let anyone totally control you again, am I right?

When you create a career or business that will enable you to be independent, you will see the world differently. You will be stronger, happier and successful in everything you do. You will bring your own personal power to the table with each new adventure. You will be a Selfish Woman in the true positive sense of the word.

You will handle situations with the confidence that has been hidden inside you all this time. You will be prepared to deal with anything that comes your way. You are stronger and more in control. Now THAT’S what I’m talking about!

It’s there… inside you… waiting to get out!  Let your true SELF shine!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

This year my goal is to give you nutritional and lifestyle information to enrich your daily life.

I want to open your eyes to easy, healthy foods that will make you think clearly, and feel fabulous.  I want you to have enough energy to accomplish your goals. To make your Dream Life a Reality! Because that’s what this is all about anyway, right?  Being the best you can be? Taking control and making your dreams come true?

Your physical well being has more power in your daily life than you realize.  It gives you physical energy, emotional balance, and a personal power that you can’t buy anywhere! It also gives you an inner peace that you can draw on in those stressful times that find us all.

And the fact that you will fit in your favorite clothes… please! You’ve got to love that! This is an area that you have probably been neglecting during your challenging battle with divorce. But all of that is over! Over I say!

This is the F portion of the word SELFISH, in The Most Selfish Woman in America. As you recall, each letter in the word SELFISH means something positive. F is for the foods you fuel your body with. It is all about clean, lean, natural foods. No more processed, chemical laden convenience foods. No drive thrus. No more frozen dinners, no matter what manufacturer makes them. And definitely no vending anything (except water)!

With a little planning, you can have everything you need without all the added toxins in processed foods. You just have to change your mindset. Believe it or not, it will actually save you money. It costs less to make your own than when you add up all the boxed, canned, frozen, foods plus the cost of eating out. Save the eating out for a special occasion.  Save the money for organic foods.

When you make your own food, you control what is in it. It’s that simple. And you can control your food budget by controlling what you buy. If you will only buy clean, lean, organic proteins, fruits and veggies, you will be taking control of your current and future health. You will begin repairing the damage your history of food intake has caused your body. And it’s not to late. Our cells replace themselves from every few hours, to every few years. The foods you give those cells to use now dictates what type of cells are created to replace the old. It’s never too late to make a difference.

Your New Year’s Declaration:

I will take control of my body!

I will take control of my health!

I will take control of my LIFE!

Until tomorrow, class dismissed.

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

It’s amazing how powerful an escape from reality can be. Even if just for a few days.

You are working hard to juggle all the changes for your new life. Positive changes, but changes none the less.

It’s very demanding on you mentally and physically. And at some point, you are going to need to step away from your “life”, and take a breather.

But the benefits are astounding!

• You have a renewed passion for making your Dream Life a reality
• You are calm, relaxed and peaceful
• You can see your goals clearly again.
• Not to mention the change in environment can be good for your ego!  (Insert imagination here.)

I just got back from a short trip to the wine country in Sonoma and Napa Valleys in California. The experience was peaceful, beautiful, and restful. I feel whole again. I’m rejuvenated, and ready to finish what I’ve started. I’m back on track to making my Dream Life a reality.

I’m also reminded how visually beautiful life can be. It’s good to be reminded. You can’t improve on Nature. She’s bigger than all of us. But sometimes we get so wrapped up in what seems like an insurmountable task, that we don’t appreciate the beauty and blessings around us. We loose sight of them, along with our goals. But when we step back and take a breath, we can see clearly again, and we remember how much we want to make our goals reality.

It really is possible. It can be done.

AND YOU’RE WORTH IT! GET BACK ON TRACK! MAKE IT HAPPEN!

IT’S YOUR TURN!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

I read the perfect advice yesterday for being successful and happy. It was written by Jeff Herring, who calls himself a “recovering marriage and family therapist.”

He said in order to be successful at anything in life, you need to take the “CPR Approach.”

CPR stands for consistent, persistent, and resistant.

Consistent – in our actions

Persistent –  in our drive, and

Resistant - to set backs and all those who may tell us we can’t do it!

How true is that! It’s so hard to keep that determination and drive we initially build in ourselves to make important changes in our lives. Life happens, and chisels away at our commitment when we are at our weakest.

It takes constant belief and trust in ourselves to build the momentum needed for change. It also takes total commitment.

But it’s hard to be totally committed to a goal when it’s not clear in your mind. Back to visualizing your Dream Life and exactly what it looks like.

When you have a clear picture of the kind of lifestyle and career  you want to achieve, it becomes tangible. Real. Yours.

What would make you want to get up in the morning, with a big smile on your face? What would make life worth living? What would make you passionate about each day? Answer these questions, and you’ve got your goal!

Promise yourself that you will be Consistent in your actions, Persistent in your drive, and Resistant to set backs.

And to hell with those who tell you you can’t achieve your Dream Life! They don’t know the New You!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

Again, it’s time to be SELFISH.

It’s time to successfully make the changes needed to accomplish your Dream Life.

The keys to success are to see what you want, live what you want, and be what you want to be. It’s that powerful!

See it!

Live it!

Be it!

The forces in the universe will align and contribute to making your Dream Life come true. But you have to do your part, which is…repeat after me:

See it!

Live it!

Be it!

Visualize what your Dream Life looks like… what your job is, what house you live in, what car you drive, where you vacation. What your physique looks like, what your hair looks like. What type of man you have sitting in your 2-door convertible, top down, driving up HWY 101 in California, your scarf flapping in the breeze. I can see it!

The more detail you attach to the vision, the more real it will become.

The sooner you start living as if the dream is real, the sooner it will become real. It’s the “live as if” theory.

Live as if you already are that person in your Dream Life. If you believe it, they believe it! Attitude is the greatest asset you have. And it is all in your control.

Attitude is what separates success from failure. Once you achieve a certain level of competence, attitude takes over. Belief in yourself will take you to your goal.

If you want to be a glamourous version of yourself, live like it. If you want to be the vivacious, dynamic person in your vision, be it, live it, just do it!

It doesn’t matter what others say about the new you. You may hear “That’s not the real you!” from old “friends”, but the reality is this is the new you. To hell with them! No one will hold you back from achieving your Dream Life! Especially old “friends!” Remember, you’ve divorced yourself from that mind set. Don’t fall back into it.

Do not tolerate any more negativity in your life. It will only suck the determination out of you. And we can’t have that!

Eliminate as much negative input from your daily life as possible. I’m serious. Cut out the news if you have to. Stop reading the paper, or your stock portfolio. Stop exposing yourself to cynical, negative people. That means family, too. And none of that mindless, draining, numbing TV.

Now is when you need positive reinforcement, not life leaching negativity.

Surround yourself with what makes you happy. Fresh flowers, candles, music, color, laughter, happy people. Now it is more important than ever before to be see the beautiful, positive side of life. It will feed your soul, and give you the strength to make your Dream Life a reality.

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

This is another time for you to be SELFISH.

When you exercise, it is all about YOU, no one else. No cell phones, no business, no diverting your focus.

If you must multi-task, do it in your breathing, your awareness and your enjoyment.

A few tips before you start:

1.  Get music on your i-Pod that has the same beat of the speed that you want to walk. That makes it easier to stay at a consistent pace without too much thought. Always have the volume low enough that you can hear what is going on around you. You are empowered and in control now, act like it!

2.  The better your breathing, the easier, and longer you can exercise. Breathe in through your nose, and out your mouth. Breathe in for the count of 5 and out for the count of 3. In through your nose for 5, and out through your mouth for 3. Even when you get winded, stay in control of your breathing. In 5, out 3. Controlled breathing will help keep you from panting, and help keep your heart rate at a safe level. If you can’t maintain this breathing pattern, slow down!

3.  Use a heart rate monitor. Just go buy one, and use it each time. The monitor will keep you informed of how efficiently you are working out. You want to stay within a “fat burning” zone.  The optimal zone will be between 130 to 145 beats per minute. The monitor tells you what your heart rate is, based on your physique . If you get higher than 145, slow down. If you are interval training, you can go as hard as you can for about a minute, then slow back down for 5 minutes until your heart rate gets back down to 130, then go again. As far as length of time, your goal is 45 minutes, 4 to 5 times a week.

4.  If the temperature is 85 degrees or hotter, take water with you. Don’t run the risk of getting overheated. It’s not worth it! Also be relentless with the sunscreen. From the base of the neck up, use at least 45 spf zinc oxide sunscreen. SkinCeuticals has a good one. And a hat or visor is a must.

If you will power walk, instead of run, you will get all of the cardio benefits without the wear and tear on your body. Hugely important.

Drink water! Drink water! Drink water! Stay hydrated.

When you are walking, make sure you know what is going on around you. Safety is the key! Take your dog, if you have one. Also choose a route that is aesthetically pleasing. A neighborhood with big houses, a local park with lots of trees and shade. Whatever you have access to, make sure you don’t get bored visually. This will increase your enjoyment.

Try to tighten your abdominal muscles while you walk. It will take awhile to do it automatically, but the more you tighten your stomach muscles, the firmer your torso will become. Also, bend your arms at the elbow and pump them with each step. You will burn more calories this way.

If your lower back starts hurting, it may be because your hamstrings need to be stretched out. After the first 5 to 10 minutes of your walk, stop and stretch your calf muscles by putting the ball of your feet on the top of a curb, and lower your heels down to the street level. It’s easier to do this leaning on a mail box or light poll. Give the stretch 1 to 2 minutes, and don’t bounce.

Then with your knees slightly bent, lean over to touch the ground. Let your body hold that position for at least a minute to stretch the hamstrings. Again, no bouncing. Then get back to the rest of your power walk.

At the end of your walk, give yourself the last 5 minutes to cool down. Slow down your pace, so that your body can naturally cool down without completely stopping.

Use this exercise time with yourself, for yourself. Do your affirmations, work out your current problems, reinforce your new attitude and approach to life. What you focus on expands. Use this time to focus on the NEW YOU.

With every step you take, you are reinforcing your new direction in Life. See it!  Live it!  Be it!

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

OK, reality check:

BATHING SUIT WEATHER!

Even living in a “Big Babe World”, we have to be healthy, confident and the best we can be!

Now is the time for an Intake Alert! Time to be aware of what you put in your mouth, and how many calories you burn in a day.

If you’ve been indulging yourself in the celebration of Summer’s arrival, like I have been, it’s time to get back in control. And if you need to undo the “indulgence”, let’s get started .

For at least 2 weeks, cut out all alcohol, artificial sugar, breads, and processed foods.  NO, WAIT!  Don’t leave me now!

If you will give yourself 2 weeks on Intake Alert, you will be shocked how effective it is.

You will loose that bloated, swollen feeling. You will brighten up your skin. Your clothes will start fitting again. I’m Serious!

And  you won’t have to pay anyone anything! It’s all in your control, and your budget.

Here is your goal:  All fresh fruits, veggies, and clean, lean protein. Lots of water, some green tea and coffee, no processed fruit juices.  No dairy other than a small yogurt a day.  Preferably everything organic.

My clean proteins of choice are ground turkey breast, boneless, skinless, totally trimmed chicken breast, lean, grass fed beef, fish and protein from beans. Then all the veggies you want, cooked or raw. Extra virgin olive oil is a great cooking medium. And fresh fruit. I know it has sugar, but it is natural, and has so many antioxidants, it is vital for your health.

In my upcoming book, THE MOST SELFISH WOMAN IN AMERICA, I will go into detail about clean and lean eating, including benefits, recipes, and easy techniques for gourmet cooking. Life and food should be enjoyed!

Again, your goal is all natural, not “diet” anything. Clean, lean, organic, fresh.

Diabetics have to adapt the Intake Alert to their specific restrictions.

A little planning will make the 2 weeks easy to stick to. Every few days prep your veggies. Cut them into snack size pieces and put them in a ziploc bag. That way you always have something ready to snack on. This also makes cooking veggies easier because the prep part is already done. Also brown your ground turkey so it’s ready to use how ever you choose. Same with the chicken breasts. Just cook enough for a couple of days, then change up the protein you cook, to prevent boredom.

Summer is the perfect time for  an Intake Alert because the berries and cherries are in season. No mess or fuss. Just rinse and eat. I love that! And the melons – fabulous! Heaven! Fruit – God’s gift to Big Babes! (I think I’m adopting that title, Big Babe.)

There is not a fat person alive that eats like this. Look around! People who eat like this are vibrant, bright-eyed, strong and healthy. They can’t help it!

Now for the Exercise part of Intake Alert. Make a point to power (or just briskly) walk at least 30 minutes a day, 4-5 times per week. Lift  weights for upper body  3 times per week.

Focus on shoulders, biceps, and triceps, keeping your core muscles tight. Proper technique is important to prevent injury, so either look it up, or get personal instruction. You only have to get trained once, take notes, and repeat at home. Takes notes, though, if you aren’t going to use a personal trainer more than once. You need to reproduce proper technique to be the most effective at home. In my upcoming book, THE MOST SELFISH WOMAN IN AMERICA, I will go into detail about weight lifting techniques for your home workouts.

This exercise routine is great for everyday life, not just this 2 week focus period. You can make a huge difference in your strength and health if you adopt this exercise program to your Dream Life that we are working toward. Again, check out my upcoming book for your Dream Life focus.

If you will commit to 2 weeks on Intake Alert, you will be sold! Just shaking up you intake, and output, will get your body back into balance.

If you have any questions, leave me a comment. I will answer.

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!

One of my favorite sports commentators is Mary Carillo. She describes the world of women’s tennis as “Big Babe Tennis.” I love that!

Here is my hommage to that description:

I choose to live in the “Big Babe World.”

I will never be that skinny, gaunt woman in the room, who is too worried about how she looks to other people (not to mention grumpy from hunger). Or who is too self-conscious to voice her opinions, and enjoy her life.

I will be the healthy, happy woman in the room, who is commanding attention, and glowing with confidence.

We have to start working with what Mother Nature gave us, and stop thinking we have to be something we are not.

Exercising, being active, enjoying your life, and living in the “Big Babe World” is a conscious decision. Make it!

One aspect of living in the “Big Babe World” is making the most of our physical self. Not striving for the unrealistic image projected by the media. It’s being the best our body can be.

This is where exercise comes in. It just takes discipline, which you are needing in other parts of your life right now, anyway. If you can master self-discipline here, you can apply it to all other areas of your life.

Think about it this way:  You will be taking control of your body and health, just like you are taking control of your life and your happiness.

The results will be confidence and pride, not to mention a sexier, healthier, happier You! And we haven’t even talked about the endorphins you get. How great it that?

Also, increase your basic daily activity level. Go out as often as possible. And I don’t mean cruising. I mean taking the dog for a walk, going to see live music in the park, enjoying different festivals in your town. What ever form it takes, explore where you live. You will be increasing your daily caloric use, and having fun at the same time.

The more you get out and do new things, the more active your life is, and the more you expose yourself to new experiences and new people.

This is one of our goals.

Another aspect of living in the “Big Babe World” is living large in your personality.

Being the dynamic personality that you have inside, you just haven’t always had the confidence to let it shine.

This is another one of our goals.

We are going to work on that….. aren’t we?

Happy Living!

Christia

The Most Selfish Woman in America!